| I have officially switched to Myspace. You can search for me by searching my email:
nkman101@hotmail.com. Hope to see you there! |
| |
| It’s 3am and I can’t sleep. I keep tossing and turning in my bed. I attempt to close my eyes but they fling back open as if my eyelids were pushing each other apart. My mind is running around and around. So many thoughts…So many questions….So much uncertainty. Why do we not experience a life transformational God? Not just a God whom we experience this amazing high and then its just back to life as we know it. But a God who we are completely and utterly transformed by. A God who we enter into an experience with and our being is changed from that encounter with him. Why do we experience his wonders…his omnipotence and then return back to the holistic state we were in previous to our encounter? I want a God who will transform me. Who by just encountering an aspect of him, I am turned inside out and upside down, never to be the same again. A God that will empower me to change…empower me to fully perform his will for my life.
On another thought, I find myself void of intimacy in this chapter of my life. Longing for it in all the wrong places, lusting after a relationship. I know we all do. We often seek the depths of intimacy within others of the opposite sex (hopefully, jk). The thing is, we were made for intimacy…we need intimacy. It wows me to know that an infant will literally die if it is not loved…if it is not touched. Why would that change as we grow up (maybe not in the strictest of the literal sense)? But we still need to be loved, to be touched. And when were not, we seek it out any where that we can find it (“cuttle buddies”, “friends with benefits”, etc.). I’m not quite sure where God fits into all this. I guess that maybe its frustrating because we don’t experience him necessarily in this most tangible way. But I do know that his intimacy with us is suppose to be so much more then we experience with that of the opposite sex, even spouses. In fact, those types of relationships are merely supposed to be a model of our intimacy with God. So why do we keep seeking it out in relationships? Why are we not fulfilled with the intimacy that God wants to provide us? |
| |
| Life is wonderful without you, But it would be even more wonderful with you. The diamond on top of the alread perfectly completed ring. |
| |
| Ok so here’s a poem that I promised i would post up for a special someone:
It’s been a long time,
Since I was yours and you were mine,
But when I stare into your face,
It’s memories that I retrace,
My lips refrain,
My mind races like a speeding train,
But as I lay silent; and your sleepy head,
All my contentment in that moment is fed,
And as your eyes close and you drift away,
I whisper my phrase “one day”… “one day”
~ Nick Mancini
Oh yeah and by the way, we are having a party at our house this friday. All are welcome. Party starts at 7:30.
|
| |
| I wish we could be as infatuated with God as we are with new relationships of the opposite sex. When you enter into those relationship all you do is think about that person. All your time is wanting to be spent with that person. You just want them to take up most of your life. But the sad fact is that these relationship will fail and we will be let down. It's an imperfect love. I want to experience that with God and I know that his love will never fail. He will never hurt me. I am ready for a tangable God! I long for it. But how do we obtain it? This to me is frustrating! |
| |
